I’m back from my travels and ready to get into my challenges. So here’s a new limerick prompt for you. Your word this week is
HIP
The previous word was TIGHT. Here are your limericks:
When Jimmie said it was tight,
He meant it was “all right”!
But that was new for me—
You see,
Thought it meant somethin’ I can’t recite.
Nicola Daly:
That notorious witch from Carlisle
Was in the trial for the Broomstick Mile
She fell at the first hurdle
Snapping her girdle
‘A hole in my tights too,’ she wept. ‘I must look a sight!’
Rall:
his leggings were very tight baryshnikov was a dancer he liked but sadly he turned out a flop dropped his ballerina partner on her bot so upset he cried all night
The Water Bottle
a bottle was fit tight in a round tap base
so I turned on the faucet in a fast pace
the water filled to the tip
and the bottle lost grip
a big splash of water blew up on my face
No Right
When some people’s finances get tight
They act entitled and darned impolite
Instead of doing with less
Think others all oppress
Who told them that “comforts” were a “right”?!
Hokum is spreading across the news
Burying the truth and providing the blues
Coffee is poured come mornings light
Erasing dreams that wound me up tight
Giving me insight to search for new clues
Graeme Sandford:
There once was a tight (hard to fit),
It squeezed and it squeezed quite a bit,
Given no space to move
Half way into a groove
Then ‘explosion!’ and that, friends, was it.
Frank Hubeny:
Tight Argumentation
The fine reasoning seemed to be tight
like a lim’rick strung through the night
when the neighbors complain
of the noise and the pain
only prove that the proof wasn’t right.
Susan Batten: She found that her knickers were tight – this discovery gave her a fright, for she couldn’t get on when her knickers were wrong. Was there no-one to help with her plight? Dan Ince: How Much…?! I went out for coffee one night And I am not one to be tight But the price of a coffee… With a drizzle of toffee… Surely six quid is not right?! Murray Clarke: The children clambered on to the Waltzer, hands gripping tight, The fair had come to town on this cold, frosty night. Katie was only eight, but loved the thrill, Sitting next to her brother and keeping very still! She laughed and she squealed, her eyes gleaming bright! Fandango:
Tight Trousers
There once was a fellow named Dwight
Whose trousers were always too tight
He bent for quarter he’d seen
Causing a large rip at the seam
So he ran home to get out of sight
Cathy Cade:
That’s The Way To Do It
Ebeneezer, of miserly repute,
was rumoured to be handing out loot.
People gawped at the sight.
Scrooge was known to be tight.
“He is now,” said Bob, “Tight as a newt.”
John W. Howell:
There once was a man named Knight,
Who is seen coming home at first light.
Rumor was he was into hiking
But that wasn’t to his liking
Truth is he was always a bit tight.
Pensitivity101:
He’d pose every Saturday night,
In jeans that were way too tight,
There was a loud rip
Which was not his zip,
And his undies on show were a sight!
Lou by the Sea:
Not for the faint hearted
The thin passage in the pothole was ever so tight
I suffer from claustrophobia – what a big fright
The slimy walls caved in
You wouldn’t call me thin
Then I plunged into darkness and broke my helmet light…
Kim Smyth:
When one is stressed, they become tight
Muscles lock up, joints not right
Stay cool and relaxed
Nerves not maxxed
Then your life will be outta sight!
K Morris Poet:
When a young man named White
Accused me of being extremely tight,
An old lady called Miss Follett
Said “you should see his wallet,
The moths all escaped last night!”
poetisinta:
A Peruvian Pinch
There once was a man from Peru,
Whose trousers were too tight that’s true,
For he sat with some strain,
And then stood up again –
There certainly was room for a view!
Richmond Road:
Darling, I have something planned
Step this way, come what may, hold my hand
But you’ll have to hold tight
As we do what feels right
And my feelings you’ll then understand
The Bag Lady:
Joe, a guy who wore pants too tight
Didn’t see the rear had a slight
Rip that was starting to spread
Just looked at his front instead
When Joe bent over, t’was a sight!
Sexagenarian Scribbbler:
The guy that my big sister’s just wed
Is a right loser, it has to be said
Tight as an arse
He’s got no class
But I can vouch for his prowess in bed!
Brazanne Muse:
He held on to his secrets, real tight,
Kept them close, never out of his sight
But he soon had enough,
Couldn’t hold so much stuff,
So he dropped all pretence and took flight
Therapy Bits:
There once was a kitten named Kite,
Who cuddled her teddy so tight.
She purred with delight,
All cozy at night,
And dreamed until morning was bright.
Teleportingweena:
Deep down in the cave at night
Formations stalagmites and stalactites (tights)
Gave cover to bats
And hid all the rats
Which gave me such a fright
***
The pickle jar lid was too tight
Do I turn it to left or to right
I twist and I twist
Until I almost break my wrist
But those pickles won’t give up the fight
***
The pickle jar so tight started glowing
I think my blood stopped flowing
When a bat flew down
And said with a frown
“You’re better off not knowing”
Dog Paddling Through Life:
Her schedule was tight and yet she
found time to write short poetry.
She picked up a BIC,
wrote a limerick,
then toddled off to make her tea.
–
I worked it, but try as I might,
the parking space was just too tight.
A smart aleck man
wedged in his sedan,
and ended up stuck there all night.
Olaf Sturlasson’s Poetry Corner:
An old man who with money was tight
One day was given a fright
What scared him the most
Was seeing the ghost
Of his wife who had died in the night
The Fumble
There once was a juggler named Dwight, Who squeezed his schedule too tight. He juggled eight clocks, While balancing blocks, And missed the last flight home that night! ***
Image Credit: Pinterest
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