Esther Chilton

I hope your week is a good one. Here is a new limerick challenge for you. Your word is

ROAD

Last week’s word was HEAT. Here are your limericks:

Nicola Daly:

‘This heat, makes me think I’m in Crete,’
Said Penny to her boy friend Pete.
‘I’d love a swim in the sea
Calamari for tea
Then followed by an ice-cream treat.’

Lou by the Sea:

In the heat of the argument she said
Why don’t we leave this and just go to bed
I know what you’re thinking
Your mind has been kinking
She crawled in and cuddled her soft toy ‘Ted.’

The Limerick Guy:

If your mouth can handle the heat
Hot and spicy food can’t be beat.
A fiery food creation
Loaded with capsaicin
Is what many cultures love to eat.

Frank Hubeny:

Heat It Up

Though I thought it was hot it was not,
since the heat got much hotter. I got
a fine thought for a verse
(not a whiny, cold curse)
as the heat got much worse than just hot.

Lesley Scoble:

Mayday, Mayday, Mayday!

It’s the hottest day ever in May
I’m so hot I’m just melting away
There’s a fan up my skirt
as I lay here inert
There’s nothing much more I can say

Susan Batten:

So you can’t beat the heat? 
So it marks your defeat? 
I suggest that you rest in the shade. 
For it’s hotter each day – you can’t keep it at bay. 
Now consider cold rain a fair trade

Cathy Cade:

The Heat is on

Haag was a new demon in hell,
Expecting promotion as well.
As global warmth kindled, though,
Transgressions dwindled so.
Waves of torpor meant felonies fell.

Blind Wilderness:

There once was a flea called Pete
Who just didn’t like the heat
He jumped in the pool
Then started to drool
When he felt something nipping his feet

Fandango:

Salty and Sweet

There once was a baker named Pete
Who danced in the midsummer heat
He spun dough with a flair
Till his sweat filled the air
Now his cupcakes are salty and sweet

Silly Frog’s Blog:

Sticky Plan

Joe had a great plan to overcome the summer heat.
At the drive-through, bought a cold triple cone treat.
Though he licked it with haste,
A brand-new problem he faced,
When most of it dripped down his arm onto the seat.

Ruth Blogs Here:

Not So Hot

There’s a heatwave down south so I’m told
Not so hot this far north, still quite cold
Chilly nip in the air
And grey clouds, it’s not fair
Showers forecast – hope they don’t take hold

The Afterlove Voice:

A Corny Heatwave

There once was fierce heat on the land,
That scorched every face, foot, and hand.
Said popcorn with sass,
“Don’t ask me, sweet grass—”
“I’ve suffered far more than you planned!”

Therapy Bits:

Scorching Heat

Sitting in the scorching heat,
A baker declared, “Life is sweet!”
Though sweat filled his hat,
He still laughed at that,
And sold spicy buns on the street.

Cee Tee Jackson:

The Heat is on

He has 10 minutes left to mow the lawn,
Or when his wife gets home, he’ll be greeted with scorn.
But the weather’s so nice,
He’s poured a vodka and ice,
And soon the heat will really be on!

Squirreljan:

The Old Biddy from Bath’s Escapade No 3

In the heat of the moment she’d taken a swing
She wasn’t too old to wear a G-string
While she sunbathed on the sand
Why shouldn’t she get tanned
Unfortunately now her arm is in a sling

John W. Howell:

There once was a fellow so neat
That he always wiped his big feet
He entered a house
Not quite like a mouse
He didn’t wipe and now faces the heat

Pensitivity101:

We’re all wilting in this heat,
Sweating armpits and smelly feet,
Trying hard to keep cool
Dissolving into a pool
And a puddle left on a seat.

Graeme Sandford:

I sizzled a lot in the heat,
from the tip of my bonce to my feet,
I cooked and I fried,
but they couldn’t decide
which part of me firstly they’d eat. 

Pictures Imperfect Blog:

Cold Shower

There once was a wooly, insolent ewe
Who brazenly bleated: “Hey, you,
Shepherd! l neither want nor need
This overwhelming, sweltering heat!”
The shepherd looked cold and dreamed of stew.

Murray Clarke:

Most people don't like sleet - they prefer heat!
Some of us are veggies - we don't eat meat.
But my friend, Bertie, is rather funny -
He actually likes his boiled eggs runny!
And that, we know, is no mean feat!

Kim Smyth:

I’ve never been one to mind the heat
It’s cold I cannot abide on my feet
My toes in the sand
Makes me feel just grand
And a day at the beach can’t be beat!
(wish I was going there today)

Brazanne Muse:

Balancing Cravings

I wanted to lose a few pounds
So put high calories out of bounds
But it’s hard in the heat
To avoid a cold treat
When the ice-cream van’s doing the rounds!

It seems that our summer is here
We smile that the sky is so clear
But we moan in the heat
That it’s too hot to eat
Off we go down the pub for a beer!

Richmond Road:

I washed from her head to her feet
In the shower, where often we’d meet
I massaged her skin
She gave me a grin
And said, ‘Darling let’s turn up the heat.’

poetisinta:

Meet Pete

There was a bold lizard named Pete,
Who worshipped the fine midday heat,
A cricket said, 
'Hey, your head's not a bed!'
He replied, 'Ah, but it improves whatever I eat!'

Said the cricket, 'But I've not got much meat!'
As he straddled the dragon's conceit,
The lizard just grinned,
Said, 'Let summer begin,
I think you'll do fine as a treat.'

The Elephant's trunk:

Sizzling!

Chef Pete was struggling with the heat
While cooking his steaks on the street.
They turned into leather
In the sizzling weather….
So he served up his shoes as a treat!

Treehugger:

In this hot and steamy heat,
What can I choose to eat?
Some say curry is helpful,
Shall I have a bellyful?
Followed by ice-cream for a treat.

Dog Paddling Through Life:

If You're Hungry...

If you're broke but like good food to eat,
find a cook who takes low price tag meat,
shapes the texture and spice,
adding cheap sides like rice
and applies just the right bit of heat.

Rall:

she could do with some heat
to warm her cold feet
winter is early this year
bleak wet weather ahead i fear
summer is hard to beat

Teleportingweena:

Pete danced really fast to the beat
His dance created enormous heat
He stood in one place
With a hot red face
Until he fell on his seat

-

Once there was a goat from Crete
Who liked the summer’s heat
He stood in the pasture
While leaping faster
Having fun as he’d loudly bleat

Olaf Sturlasson's Poetry Corner:

Grimbard; a smith of renown
Created a light metal gown
Reflecting the heat
As he walked down the street
Grimbard was the talk of the town

John McGuigan:

I just can’t write limericks in this heat
I need air conditioning
Cold beer
And icy water for my feet
There’s not much point in trying to write
It’ll just come out as a load of shite.

Thru Violet's Lentz:

Whoops

When the heat of the moment did pass
The gent did then smile at the lass
“Please don’t misunderstand
I meant to reach for your hand
but somehow grabbed a handful of ass.”

The lass she was not
taken in, by the gent with
the sly little grin
Thinks he’s slick! Then a quick-  kick!
“Whoops! That was meant for your shin!”

***

Image credit: Pinterest