Happy Monday to everyone out there. Here’s to a good week – and also a new limerick challenge. Your word is
BATH
Last week’s prompt was SPROUT. There were some brilliant limericks:
Nicola Daly:
Gordon goat ate sprout after sprout
How many? He completely lost count
So it wasn’t any wonder
His tummy rumbled like thunder
Just don’t light a match, be in no doubt!
A Case of the Gout
An indulgent old fellow quite stout
Developed a case of the gout
His big toe began swelling
And he started out yelling
“I’ve grown a mahogany sprout!”
There once was a little Boy Scout
Who was heard one morning to shout,
‘My voice it has dropped,
my treble has flopped,
and my pubic hair’s started to sprout!”
Susan Batten:
When his bonsai decided to sprout
He observed the new growth with a shout,
‘but that’s not quite the thing!
You can’t just have a fling!
If you do it again, you are out.
There once was a young, tiny sprout
It would grow into such obvious clout
An apple a day
Keeps doctors away
But this sprout with such clout had his doubt.
Doomed
Wond’ring why the spring seedlings won’t sprout,
in the garden, I let the dogs out.
Little Ruff cocks his leg,
aiming at my seed bed,
and the reason’s no longer in doubt.
The teenaged boy gave a great shout,
The first day his whiskers did sprout.
When he started to shave
He acted so brave.
At the first sight of blood, he passed out.
The Joy Of Sprouting
It might sprout if it only went out
of its shell and then looked all about,
saw the sun in the sky
and white clouds flying high.
If it did . . . well, it did with a shout.
Olaf Sturlasson’s Poetry Corner:
A limerick is starting to sprout In my mind; of that there is no doubt Which way it will go I simply don't know All I have to do is let it out.
Dilemma
I overheard my OCD neighbor scream and shout,
From her garden where she found one funky sprout.
“I hand-planted every seed!”
“I won’t sleep if that’s a weed!”
“But I’ll wreck that even row if I must pull it out!”
There once was a shy little sprout,
Who pushed through the soil to peek out.
It stretched in the sun,
Said, “Growing is fun!”
And wiggled its green leaves about.
Hair Raising!
The balding young man from Broadstairs,
Was desperate to sprout some new hairs.
Red, white or blue,
Any colour would do,
He was a punk so could handle the stares.
Murray Clarke:
Just before you throw them out,
Don't forget the humble sprout.
They're full of vitamins C and K,
Improve digestion - eat every day.
Even better, my friends, than sauerkraut!
His nickname at school was Sprout
As he grew up as well as out,
But he didn’t mind
As most people were kind
And knew what he was all about.
***
He had depths many wanted to share,
The ability to genuinely care,
His smile flooded a room
With bright sunshine, not gloom,
A pure soul, and so preciously rare.
Rall:
he always did sprout such rubbish threatens and promises to punish lies like blow flies swarm from his mouth has sex with a golf stick anywhere south add a war to flavour his rotten fish power and money his favourite dish. Pete Springer: When Penny Twiddle started to act out Her teacher, Mr. Pickle, gave a shout. But that didn’t faze the little lass, She just gave him a little more sass. Another visit to see the principal, no doubt.
Lou by the Sea:
The Unloved Sprout
Let’s consider the unloved sprout At Christmas it carries more clout Jazz it up with bacon Sauteed and then shaken But still you’d rather be without.
Vegetable Snob
I could not would not avoid the obvious German rhyme: A stuck-up vegetable styled itself as a Brussel sprout, And claimed to be Belgian – but there was some doubt. When challenged it shouted: “So you think I’m German? Tarnation, you turnip, just call me Hermann. I cannot deny it: YES! I am a Kraut.”
A cabbage sprout wanted to be big So he ate and grew like a pig And soon he reached the size To ultimately win the prize He became sauerkraut with a jig.
***
She waited for her buzzoms to sprout When they did she gave a loud shout Then her mama said listen here dear You really need a brassier And of this there really was no doubt.
Kate in Cornwall:
Don’t leave that vital stage out
It doesn’t bear thinking about
Mung beans need soaking
And no, I’m not joking
You can guess where they’re going to sprout!
The pig had an extra large snout It helped as he ate every sprout His appetite keen The biggest I’ve seen Comes handy when carving him out. Life Lessons: Time of Death? There was a young woman from Hall who died jumping over a wall. T’would have been a sad thing if she’d died in the spring, but she didn’t. She died in the fall. Tony: And you will grow, Beneath the ancient sleep of the soil, where shadows of forgotten seasons drift like wandering ghosts, a green sprout awakens with the audacity of a secret. No trumpet announces its birth, no kingdom awaits its crown, yet it rises with the quiet rebellion of life itself. Through the dark patience of earth and stone it stretches, trembling but undefeated, as though the universe had hidden within that fragile blade a whisper older than time. Grow, even where the world believes nothing will ever live again… Dog Paddling Through Life: the little seeds started to sprout before long the plants were quite stout how quickly they grew then before we knew the deer came and cleared them all out.
Richard III was a secret vegetarian
He kept it from his troops, his archers and his spearmen
But at Bosworth the soldiers found him out
When they heard King Richard’s desperate shout
A sprout! A sprout! A sprout!
My kingdom for a sprout.
There once was a chef with a sprout,
Who claimed it could help him think out.
He sautéed it with flair,
Tossed salt in the air—
Now his recipes really sprout out!
In the spring things begin to sprout..
There’s lots of daffodils about
Then the deer come along
And eat all day long….
No wonder the gardeners shout!
Bad Ending
There once was a bulldog named Sprout,
Who chased every bee round about.
He stole their honeycomb,
Tried dragging it back home -
That's how he came to a sticky end there's no doubt!
Inside-Out
An explorer from Sector Re-Doubt
Watched a Martian remarkably sprout
With a green leafy head
“I’m a planet!” it said
And turned itself fully inside-out
Overcooked sprouts are not meant to be Destroying all those vitamins K and C They should be al dente With goodness a plenty Done to death doesn’t do it for me. Treehugger: There’s a blockage in our spout, We poked and pried, but nothing came out. Was it a stone or a mouse? What had got into the house? The culprit was a tiny wee sprout.
***

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