Happy new week. I hope you all had a good weekend. Ready for a limerick challenge? Your new word is
CANDY
Last week’s prompt was BORING. You came up with some great limericks:
Bob, at the cricket, was scoring
But found the game endlessly boring
At the end of the over
He lay in the clover
And ten seconds later was snoring.
Nicola Daly:
I once had a teacher so boring
By lunchtime he had us all snoring
When he’d see our heads nod
He’d wake us with a poke and a prod
And then shout at us til he was roaring!
The visit to Grannie was boring.
Mum and Gran never stopped jawing,
till Gran’s old dog, Nelly,
who’s old and quite smelly,
found Mum’s fur hat and started gnawing.
some days are incredibly boring
the drone of the rain that is poring
stops you taking down notes
coz your mind floats to boats
and your boss finds you noisily snoring!
The mall was once nice for exploring
Yet lately it’s just been so boring
Nothing new thru the door
Same old things as before
They haven’t even installed new flooring!
There are those always craving attention
And their behavior is fraught with pretension
But I have to say
Being boring’s OK…
It rarely faces bitter dissension…
Unlike narcissism
Though it’s boring I’m snoring away
all those daydreams that come during day
and those nightmares as well
got me snoring. I’d tell
you a story – “It’s boring,” you say.
I started today by exploring
Some places I thought might be boring
I went for a stroll
To the bibliopole
Where I learned about fiscal offshoring!
Your new word is: Boring
This Limerick is utterly boring,
you’re probably already snoring,
It sent me to sleep,
forget counting sheep,
just read this… zzzzzzz
Joe could never be called boring
He always had his friends roaring
His jokes were not neat
Always about feet
No matter as drinks kept pouring.
Their once was a man who was roaring,
That he hated cleaning the flooring.
While down on his knees,
Working harder than bees,
His teen walked in talking of boring.
Stuck indoors all day is so boring
Outside it’s raining and pouring
To make matters worse
To quote from the verse
The bloody old man is snoring!
Murray Clarke:
It’s boring, it’s boring, thick snow keeps on falling.
Little Baby Jesus will not stop his bawling!
A slug of brandy might do the trick,
Or a tap on the head from a candlestick?
Or, maybe, hide the small infant under a . . .
tarpaulin!
Round and jolly, rotund and red
Unlikely he’ll be able to see his bed,
Boring is as boring does,
Unshaven cheeks encased in fuzz,
A jaunty hat placed on his head.
No time to waste, so much to do,
Pink for the girls, but boys prefer blue,
Feed all the reindeer, prepare for flight
Load up the sled, we leave tonight,
But first I have to go to the loo.
Down chimneys fast, can’t stop too long,
An occasional mince pie can’t be wrong,
Far from boring, a life not dull,
Taking advantage of every lull,
The tradition of Christmas still proves strong.
December Dreams
December is here again, out come the lights
Travelers stranded from overbooking flights
Into the New Year we will all go exploring
Hoping for adventures that aren’t all boring
Dealing with the ground being all white.
My life’s rather boring, ’tis true.
Hard liquor I do not consume
unlike Raccoon breaking in
to top shelf liquor then
passing out drunk in the loo.
The Bored Elf
There once was an elf named Lee,
Of Christmas no longer a devotee,
With the toys he was bored,
And playing the same old record,
‘Any more and I’ll toss this Christmas tree!’
–
He yearned for some summer delight,
Not snowflakes or gifts wrapped up tight.
While others would cheer,
He’d vanish, each year,
For adventures with pretty Snow White!
Olaf Sturlasson’s Poetry Corner:
Two countries that couldn’t stop warring
Said; this is just getting boring
We should just quit
Try peace for a bit
Instead of all this constant warring.
Is it rue
Your hearts not moved
By Poetry
That you cannot raise a smile
For the wit
Of a Limerick
That you yawn at the sweet words
Of a song
you may have heard?
How absurd
It makes you very vey boring.
Rall:
lately
i’ve become very boring
do lots of embroidery and drawing
should get out more
hit the dance floor
my limbs are frozen need thawing
There once was a duke, rich and soaring,
Whose parties were lavish, but boring.
He served up champagne
But all was in vain,
The guests fell to dozing and snoring.
–
There once was a wizard from Goring
Who conjured a storm that kept pouring.
His spell went astray
Turned night into day –
Now he lectures the sun, and it’s boring.
–
A woodworm who specialized in oak
Had her eye on a new fancy bloke.
She showed off her boring
Tunneling and scoring
But he wandered out for a smoke.
When a young man said, “you are boring!”
I awoke from a great bout of snoring,
And I said to him, “Jim,
You are quite petite and slim.
You could easily fit under my new flooring …!”
Whoever said “boring is bad”
Must honestly be a bit mad;
Because seasons of calm, with a lull
Though quiet and dull
Make a heart healthy and glad.
To Ragoon by Noon
The Curious Expedition of the Boring Men
Ten men in my room, all boring,
They’re drilling a hole in my flooring,
I reckon by noon,
They’ll get to Rangoon,
And then we can all go exploring.
Scandals
Golly this teacher is so B O R I N G
I swear half my class is snoring
Are you Miss Day?, said a cop at the door
Oh my Gosh, is my teacher a whore ?
Nope said the cop, she’s just into hoarding.
There once was a scholar exploring,
Whose lectures were famously boring.
He droned on for ages,
Through all of the pages,
Till half of his class lay snoring.
But one day a student imploring
Said, “Please, can you make it less boring?”
He brightened his tone,
Used jokes of his own,
And soon had the whole classroom roaring.
A kid with a drill was boring
A hole in some wood flooring
When Dad found out
He began to shout
In fact he was actually roaring!
–
Outside the rain was just pouring
Everything inside was just boring
So the kid he went out
Just to splash about
But his Mom began imploring (Why???)
The car trip was rather boring
I ate, then started snoring
The clouds were low
The wind started to blow
Thank goodness it wasn’t pouring.
Stuck indoors all day is so boring
Outside it’s raining and pouring
To make matters worse
To quote from the verse
The bloody old man is snoring!
A man at the field, so adoring,
Watched baseball while fans were all roaring.
But innings dragged on,
He stifled a yawn,
Turns out that this game can be boring!
Wilf Leahy:
Boring the pants off me
Up and down the ladder
decorating this Christmas tree.
There was a young lady called Sly
who had the attention span of a fly –
When asked ‘bout the buzz,
her reply always was:
“As boring as watching paint dry!”
The elves claimed toy-making was boring
and bitched about Santa’s loud snoring
but what irked them the most
and really burned their toast
was how the reindeer had ruined the flooring!
One from iMartist from last week’s prompt SHOPPING:
I wasn’t much into shopping
I’d prefer an afternoon of bopping
Then she made me a meal
Abd I started to feel
Domesticated with a sudden urge for some mopping.
***
Image credit: Pinterest
Esther Chilton 
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