Happy start of the week. I hope you have a great Monday. Here’s a new limerick challenge. Your word is
SCALE
Last week’s prompt was SNACKS. You came up with some hilarious limericks:
Nicola Daly:
Wielding my giant axe
Makes me hungry for chocolatey snacks
But two becomes four
And I eat more and more
And now I can’t do up the zip on my slacks!
Salty or Sweet
What I choose can be salty or sweet
Just depends what I crave for my treat
Too much candy or cake
Taste buds soon need a break
Then those crunchy crisp snacks can’t be beat.
Snickety Snacks
All the snickety snacks in my pack
are quite tasty and none of them lack
a smart crunch. One or two
might sound odd, but a few
sound delightful when crunch leads to crack.
I never used to eat many snacks
Yet lately my tummy is under attack
Food has better taste
Which is expanding my waist
Pretty soon I’ll be dressed in sacks!
Kate in Cornwall:
There was a Greek fella named Ajax
Who owned a taverna in Halifax
His ‘special’ halloumi
Would cheer up the gloomy
Who travelled miles for one of his snacks.
Taco Tuesday
Taco Tuesday’s pistachio paste is applied with a sponge
Jiminy Cricket is the chef and is listening to some grunge
As popcorn balls gently float in burned out pepperoni grease
Nurse Ratchet re-appears and tries to destroy the peace
Leaving you at the edge of an altered mind taking another plunge.
Defending the goal from attacks,
I stand firm with the other full-backs
But my ultimate aim
Is always the same:
I live for half-time and the snacks!
There once was a man broke his Vax,
whilst hoovering up Hollywood snacks,
the Alien died,
Godzilla got fried,
and he’d overfilled the bag past the ‘Max.’
Tired of all sugarless hacks
Wanting a real sugary snack
Joe raided the fridge
Not even a smidge
Of sweetness he didn’t find Jack!
In All Fairness…
There once was a girl named Aimee
Who is a member of the entitled Gen Z
Saved no funds for her snacks
Called for more “capitalist attacks”
Saying “fairness” means snacks must be free.
There once were two lumber jacks,
Who carried their lunch on their backs.
One day in a hurry,
They grabbed day old curry.
And now drink Imodium for snacks.
There was once a woman who lacked
the courage to stop eating snacks
until one day her doctor
with a cholesterol that rocked her
suggested a vegetable hack.
Now, a spud is a veg, I would say;
And a crisp is potato: hooray!
So, when counting our packs
As we tuck into snacks,
It’s important to have five a day!
Rall:
there was a girl who lived on midnight snacks
slept all day and at night wandered along tracks
she howled at the moon and sang strange songs
the way she was living was dangerous and wrong
she should seek treatment for being so cracked.
Last night I got up for snacks
A pie and some chocolate cats
A bottle of French pernod
A smidgen of rice from Kernow
Then a morning spent at the quacks!
Murray Clarke:
I found some old socks – thought they were Max’s
Hidden in the fridge on top of some snacks-ies.
It all seemed so strange –
There was no one to blame,
Then I realised the socks must have been Jack’s!
Snacks, a delicious sin,
Relished with an impish grin:
The pounds may creep on
And take month to be gone,
But I never liked being thin!
I needed some snacks for the night,
to help my hungry tummy feel right,
So I snuck out of bed,
tripped over and bumped my head,
and filled my arms full of delight.
We ran down the hall to get snacks
We should’ve been watching our backs
Mom yelled not now
and Dad had a cow
cleaning crumbs from the couches deep cracks
Snacks shouldn’t come before dinner
Just like boogers are picked as a winner
Use a tissue next time
Wash your hands of that grime
Getting tape worms will make you much thinner
Bill left the snacks on the floor
Jenny said she wanted some more
the cold stuff did spoil
There are chips in the soil
we’ll stay hungry just like before
Snacks are like cookies and chips
Don’t eat them if you’re doing flips
You’ll barf them right up
Hope it gets in a cup
And there’s a napkin to clean off your lips
Resa:
Thanks to all who wrote these limericks!
I had fun following your word tricks.
They are tasty, like snacks
But now I’ve got to get back
To draw with pen and a esther tics.
“Look,” said the Doc, “face the facts
If it looks like a duck then it quacks
Your calorie count
Is a staggering amount
You have got to stop eating those snacks”
***
I said to the Doc, “listen here
It’s either the snacks or a beer
And by way of an answer
I already have cancer
So really, there’s nothing to fear.
Cat Snacks
My cats are insistent that snacks
Are required and not simply kind acts
For a Churu they run
They think Greenies are fun
And I must always pay the cheese tax.
Black Bart’s Snack Attack
On the seas sailed the pirate Black Bart,
With a treasure map tucked next to his heart
He stored great big sacs
To fill with his favourite snacks
He’d made plundering such a fine art.
Olaf Sturlasson’s Poetry Corner:
A train driver who was very late
With passengers who had to wait
For blocking the tracks
Where the wrong kind of snacks
The kind of snacks nobody ate.
While selecting her evening snacks
Ma found holes in her favourite packs.
Vowed she’d ration Mog’s kibble
when she saw flour bags nibbled,
and in the dust, tiny paw tracks.
hollywood have rejected my script
they have suggested i must be insane
who? They mocked
would watch a movie
entitled “Snacks on a Plane”
Meanie
There once was a boy with a backpack
Who carried ’round delicious snacks
No one asked him to share
No one ever would dare
He was mean as a snake in a sack!
A kitten named Paws loved her snacks,
She’d hide them in secret small sacks.
With a purr and a grin,
She’d sneak one again—
Then nap on her mountain of snacks!
Silly Sonny loved to snack
Carried around a full back pack
Popcorn and nuts
No if, ands, or buts
With candy bars
From here to Mars!
***
Silly Sonny loved his snacks
Filled his back pack up to the max
With candy and nuts,
No ifs, ands, or buts
Just sit back, eat and relax.
***
Snacks, snacks such beautiful things
When you munch and crunch, your brain pings
Sugar and salt
Don’t stop, don’t halt
The more you eat a bell rings.
***
Racks and racks and racks of snacks
Grab them all – your lip smacks
Yum yum yum
In your tum tum tum
Fill up your stomach to the max.
Foodie Fool!
A mighty snack attack hit me
I downed a whole bag of hot cheetos quickly
To my surprise
I nearly died
Extreme Gastritis made me feel quite sickly.
Time Out
Two koalas who munched on some snacks
Said, “Eucalyptus leaves help us relax!”
We’ll sleep twenty hours,
High up in the bowers,
With our bellies good and stuffed to the max!”
But the koalas awoke filled with dread,
For a large web was strung over their head.
“Who spun this huge lace
Right over our face?
We’re snacking and napping!” the grumpy bears said.
There once was a man named Fred,
Who said he’d rather be dead,
than give up his snacks
to stop heart attacks
but he would give up snacking in bed.
One evening Luke had a strong craving
and a huge bag of snacks felt life-saving…
While Star Wars he saw,
he watched Yoda in awe –
But at The End… felt he not so amazing.
Walking with our packs,
Fully loaded down with snacks.
We walk very little,
We laugh, eat and giggle.
Healthy exercise it lacks.
snack not too fast
nor taken aback
***
Esther Chilton 
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