Can You Tell A Story In…

Thursday has come round so quickly this week. Here’s your new story challenge.

Can you tell a story in 54 words using the following words in it somewhere:

  • GERBIL
  • WONDERLAND
  • ZIP
  • AFTERSHAVE
  • BANSHEE

Last week’s challenge was to write a story in 26 words using the following three words in it somewhere:

  • ORGANIC
  • CATERPILLAR
  • SUDOKU

Here are your super stories:

Dawgy Daddy Responds:

The caterpillar was successful when he finished the suduko last night. He moved over to the organic compost pile where he read his corpus of poetry.

Rall:

Not a happy little vegemite today. Found a caterpillar in my organic salad and I read that science has discovered that sudoku players are unimaginative simpletons.

Pete:

Reconciling my checkbook was an unpleasant sudoku puzzle back in the day. I would load up the hookah with organic caterpillar and smoke cipher woes away.

Help from Heaven:

Finding A Balance Between Humans And Nature

Completing his sudoku game, John noticed a caterpillar larger than usual. He realized the organic fertilizer used on his flowers was not good for the wildlife.

Christopher Farley:

‘Despite vegetables being good for the brain,’ said the caterpillar, eating a leaf of organic kale, ‘I still can’t work out how to play this sudoku.’

Graeme Sandford:

“Nine numbers?” queried Caterpillar. 

“It seems so,” answered Millipede. 

“And it’s called ‘Sudoku?’ asked Caterpillar. 

“And we can recycle it forever?”

“They said it was organic.”

Nicola Daly:

After a leisurely morning completing the ‘Times’ sudoku, Colin the Caterpillar had a snooze and then crawled to his vegetable patch to tend his organic cabbages.

Annette Rochelle-Aben:

Built It They Will Come

When she wasn’t participating in organic gardening classes to teach children how to plant flowers for butterflies, Calidora caterpillar was cocooned in her lair mastering sudoku.

My Mind Mappings:

Mom was working on her sudoku puzzle.

A caterpillar crawled across her newspaper.

Her toddler son grabbed it and swallowed it.

“It’s okay, Mom, it’s organic!”

Pensitivity101:

The caterpillar was smart. Crosswords were for sissies, sudoku much more challenging. He crossed all eight pairs of his legs and chewed on his organic supper.

Murray Clarke:

Lord Anthony Bamford, chairman of JCB, and a keen player of sudoku, boasts his excavators are superior to his rival’s Caterpillar – especially when lifting organic vegetables.

iMartist:

Some People Just Aren’t Cut Out For The Job

Mr. Miller spent time in the garden doing the latest sudoku. Unable to complete it, he spits out his organic smoothie and steps on a caterpillar.

L Wie:

The Must-have For Some Enthusiasts

The caterpillars were lazily munching on some leaves while the professor watched his newest creation solving sudokus: The “organic AI” – the perfect brain in a butterfly.

Christine Mallaband-brown:

The caterpillar crawled across the suduko square in an organic way.

Suddenly, a butterfly emerged, the magic result of completing the puzzle. It fluttered away happily.

showtunessal:

Tom and I were walking under my umbrella to Sudoku Club. We spotted a caterpillar hanging out with us. Our eyes and lips organically met.

Silly Frog’s Blog:

Non-organic Spring 2020, with caterpillar volumes unimpeded by human activities, produced more numbers than a sudoku tournament! Fattened birds later walked South avoiding Autumn butterfly traffic.

John W. Howell:

My pet caterpillar is fed only organic jasmine leaves which is why he is a big help at finalizing my sudoku puzzle.

Teleportingweena:

Sudoku, the voracious caterpillar, munched on all the leaves he could see. As a vegetarian he only preferred the organic kind, free from pesticides of course.

Let’s Write:

Caterpillar’s Bash

A caterpillar threw a bash,

Sudoku, organic pancakes – what a splash!

Magicians danced free,

Till the pancakes exploded, such debris!

So it’s sticky chaos for tea!

Lily’s Corner:

Slow Math

Underneath the organic overgrown steps I found the dice and a blank sudoku. This will take awhile as my math is as slow as a caterpillar.

Therapy Bits:

An organic farmer paused her work to watch a caterpillar inch across a cabbage leaf. Later, over tea, she solved a sudoku and smiled—balance restored.

Richmond Road:

On Matters Of Life And Death

Sitting in the morning sun
Doing the Sudoku
A caterpillar in a tree
Gets eaten by a cuckoo

Part Two

It goes to show, that’s how things go
When everything’s botanic
Round the bend, that’s how things trend
In the end we’re all organic

The End

Squirreljan:

The caterpillar entered the sudoku maze, numbered gates opening as he wriggled through correctly. Finally, he reached the grass. Yuk – humongous effort and it wasn’t organic.

Treehugger:

As I watched the caterpillar munching on my organic cabbages, I resisted reaching for the bug tweezers and sat on the swing, calmly solving my Sudoku puzzle.

The Elephant’s Trunk:

Feed Your Head

A neon green hookah-smoking caterpillar enjoyed solving sudoku puzzles under the sun, its colorful segments aligning like numbers in an organic game of life and logic.

Poetry Pieces:

You Are What You Eat (whatever that means)

One guy:  “I swear on my grandmother’s bible… I saw a caterpillar working a sudoku!”

Other guy:  “You need to quit eating all that organic crud.”

***

69 responses to “Can You Tell A Story In…”

  1. the man is in wonderland

    a world of his own

    shown by his ass kissers

    but that flat world of his

    gerbil and dust gets zip

    after his shave

    and salve and balm

    there is near not enough

    to calm

    the banshee s wail

    not all hail

    but off with him to jail!

    Liked by 3 people

  2. three words short sorry

    Liked by 1 person

  3. nikidaly70 Avatar
    nikidaly70

    Gerome Gerbil tipped the bottle over himself, leaped from the top of the Wonky Winterland Tower, and zipped all the way to the bottom screaming like a banshee.
    ‘And all because the she-gerbil loves Milk Tray,’ he crooned.
    ‘You’ve gone a bit overboard on the aftershave,’ sniffed Mrs Gerome. ‘I’ll take the chocolates, though.’

    Liked by 6 people

    1. That made me laugh out loud 😂😂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. nikidaly70 Avatar
        nikidaly70

        I thought you might remember the advert! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I really do and could imagine it 😂

        Liked by 1 person

  4. […] Can You Tell A Story In… […]

    Liked by 2 people

  5. well, remember that YOU asked us to do this…

    Ho Ho NO | Annette Rochelle Aben

    Liked by 3 people

  6. oh, I am having a bit a go round with Twitter. they seem to think I am trying to hack into my own account, and I am trying to get them to let me…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh no! What a pain.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. “A beautiful sight, oh, we’re happy tonight Walking in a winter wonderland.”

    The gerbil loved Christmas Day. While his owner always received aftershave, he bought him sets of clothes and made videos to share online. Today was a biker look.

    A pulled zip and gerbil wailed like a banshee. He’d forgotten about the fur.

    Liked by 7 people

    1. Poor thing 😂😂

      Like

  8. Kate in Cornwall Avatar
    Kate in Cornwall

    Angry crowds at Rodent Wonderland protested against the use of a gerbil to advertise Dior’s latest aftershave. Mavis X, infamous animal rights activist and banshee, screamed, “he’ll die if he falls!” as the gerbil was zip-wired into a bedroom with a bottle of Eau de Jerboa in his rucksack. The scene was subsequently cut.

    Liked by 7 people

    1. I’d have loved to have seen that 😂😂

      Like

  9. squirreljan Avatar
    squirreljan

    Paddy sneaked in to Zip Wire Wonderland to record his podcast. “On this spooky moonlit night, I am here to investigate the rumours of a banshee. Nooo!” A mind blowing shriek caused him to fall, petrifying the resident gerbil clan. As Paddy breathed his last, he realised he’d forgotten to wear his lucky aftershave.

    Liked by 7 people

    1. That’ll teach him 😂😂

      Like

  10. […] week Esther Chilton invites us to tell a story in 54 words using the following words in it […]

    Liked by 2 people

  11. […] These are the prompts for the short story in Esther Chilton’s challenge […]

    Liked by 2 people

  12. While foraging around he saw zip, zilch, nada. This gerbil in wonderland found nothing but scarcity. Living his life with a fork in a world of soup, His one find; a bottled aftershave labeled “Banshee”. Though intrigued, the furry little critter needed no pheromone smothering tincture. It would only prolong his amorous dry spell.

    Liked by 6 people

    1. Great imagination, Pete!

      Like

  13. […] Can You Tell A Story In… […]

    Liked by 2 people

  14. Creative word choices!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I like to challenge!

      Like

    2. By the way, Dawn, my review of The Mystery of the Pink Poodle will be on my blog tomorrow 😊

      Like

  15. […] for Can You Tell A Story In #310 from Esther Chilton. The prompts are gerbil, wonderland, aftershave, banshee, and zip, and the […]

    Liked by 2 people

  16. […] Can You Tell a Story in … 56 words […]

    Liked by 2 people

  17. The most difficult is to make a photo fit the story (not with AI but a little bit editing). I love to read the other stories.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m really glad you enjoy them 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  18. […] afternoon everyone, this is my submission for Esther Chilton‘s prompt for this […]

    Liked by 2 people

  19. ‘Banshee’ aftershave was being advertised on the TV again. She remembered buying it for her ex husband, but when he tried it, it smelled like a pickled Gerbil! It didn’t take her to wonderland. No she would keep her purse zipped this time. Her new partner was sadly more of an ‘Old spice’ guy!

    Liked by 4 people

    1. That’s so funny. I had gerbils and they didn’t smell too good – wouldn’t think they would have pickled either 😂😂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. My mind works in odd ways!

        Liked by 1 person

  20. […] her “Can You Tell a Story In…” prompt today, Esther Chilton has challenged us to tell a 54-word story using the words gerbil, […]

    Liked by 3 people

  21. these strange counter cultural folk
    wailed at the moon like banshees
    at their ceremonies
    sprayed each other with something
    which smelled like opium aftershave
    kept gerbils zipped in their jeans
    called their commune Wonderland
    they invited her to join.
    armed with pre prepared excuses
    just in case
    she feigned disappointment
    declined the offer
    then scarpered

    Liked by 3 people

    1. That’s so funny. Love it!

      Like

  22. Very interesting 26-word atories.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks, Miriam. I’m glad you enjoyed them.

      Liked by 1 person

  23. Brilliant Esther and love the responses to last week’s too… They will definitely have to be creative with this week’s prompts.. ♥

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for reading, Sally. The writers produce such great work! ❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  24. […] Can you tell a story in 54 words using the following words in it somewhere: […]

    Liked by 2 people

  25. Alison’s own personal wonderland was to speed down the zip wire over the river Aginé. Odd, she thought, as she spotted a gerbil heading over the other side, screaming like a banshee. “Phantom, phantom,” it yelled.

    Hang on, thought Alison, what would a gerbil on a zip wire want with an expensive Rabanne aftershave?

    Sent from Yahoo Mail for iPhone

    Liked by 3 people

    1. What, indeed? Very amusing, Liz 😂😂

      Liked by 1 person

  26. […] This week, Esther gives us the following words to create a poem or story in exactly 54 words: GERBIL; WONDERLAND; ZIP; AFTERSHAVE & BANSHEE https://estherchilton.co.uk/2025/10/23/can-you-tell-a-story-in-310/ […]

    Liked by 1 person

  27. I used to have to cut words to get the count right, but lately I have to add them. In this instance, quite a lot of them. Cheating again?

    ****
    A SILLY POEM DEALING WITH NOSTALGIA AND MAKING VAGUE REFERENCE TO RUMOURED SEXUAL PRACTICES WITH SMALL ANIMALS.
    ****
    Slapping on the aftershave
    Whilst zipping up my pants
    Susie and The Banshees
    Are playing at a dance
    Gerbil in my pocket
    In case I get the chance
    In this nostalgic wonderland
    With dreams of old romance.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s inspirational cheating or something like that!

      Like

  28. A little late

    He slapped on the aftershave and screamed like a banshee at the sting. A quick ride on the zip line to Gerbal Wonderland where the air is quiet and there is plenty to eat.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The perfect place to go!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Especially if you like gerbils.

        Liked by 1 person

  29. […] response to Esther Chilton’s Can You Tell A Story In 54 Words? Use the following words in a poem or story: GERBIL, WONDERLAND, ZIP, AFTERSHAVE, […]

    Liked by 1 person

  30. A very silly poem. Thank you for the challenging prompt words Esther!

    The Banshee (Short Version 54 Words)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I really enjoyed it 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  31. […] for Esther’s “Can You Tell A Story In” – #310in exactly 54 words using these five prompts:‘gerbil’, ‘wonderland’, […]

    Liked by 1 person

  32. […] Can You Tell A Story In… […]

    Liked by 1 person

  33. Smallfry’s shortcut through Wonderland Meadow was a dangerous one. It was the turf of Banshee, the bully gerbil. 

    Marlee Mouse’s tip for the tiny rodent was a winner. “Stay downwind from the bully. The smell of his putrid aftershave will let you know where he is.”

    Smallfry could now zip across the meadow undetected. 

    Liked by 1 person

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