Happy new week. I hope it’s a good one for you. Your fresh limerick challenge this week is:
KILT
Last week’s prompt was FRIES. You came up with some funny limericks:
There once was a man making fries,
Their ingredients were a big surprise
Not potato as suspected
But plantain; not expected!
Delightful to the taste buds and eyes!
Nicola Daly:
Remember that mad witch from Carlisle
Rides a broomstick with an absence of style?
Wanting fish with her fries
To the chippy she flies
But falls off flying over the stile.
For watching a lunar eclipse
Relaxing with smiles on our lips,
I don’t think it wise
Eating burger and fries,
So let’s all enjoy fish and chips!
Once in the Sargasso sea
I found an isle with a tree
Hanging from its limbs
Fries and fresh Pimms
Bizarrely adorned with chutney!
There once was a man with blue eyes
Who’s stomach was not near their size.
He pulled in a drive through
With a scream and a note too.
Demanding a bushel of hot garlic fries.
When in a poke
Order fries and Coke
Healthy? No
But there you go
Simplicity’s no joke.
***
“Would you like fries with that?”
Asked the girl in the orange hat
Corporate says so
Though my answer is “No”
Money for them adds to my fat.
Though a liar gets lost in his lies
and a crier annoys with his cries,
what is bad can get worse
(and what’s worse than a curse?),
but a hamburger goes well with fries.
There once was a boy from Van Nuys
Whose arms were made of French fries
He tried to keep ‘way
The mad, hungry frey
But they ate up his arms and he died.
Making French fries from potato supplies
For his girl he planned the surprise
And as they cooked
In the mirror he looked
Forgetting time, fries met their demise
Now as Fries met their doom
He freshened the room
Hastening to make something better
In came his Irish Setter
So he chased him out with a broom.
When her hair the beautician fries
All you hear are her plaintiff cries
There’s so much damage that’s been done
And they say don’t be crying hun
Claims of restoration are lies.
Leona loved burgers with fries
Her mom tried to never deny
One day her mom chose a salad
The story sung in a ballad
Lettuce choked Leona, she died.
There once was a chef who made fries,
With flavours that dazzled our eyes.
One bite was so grand,
We all made a stand,
For a second, we’d shout in surprise!
She goes to the beach and she lies
‘Neath the sun where she gradually fries
There in a coma
She contracts Meleanoma
Some years later she tragically dies
***
Surely there’s no one denies
That a burger goes better with fries
Completing the joke
A gallon of coke
A feast for the soul and the eyes.
***
Oh what a birthday surprise!
A sad, soggy burger with fries
I dine all alone
And just wait by the phone
Every year since we said our goodbyes.
Calorie free is all lies
When talking about french fries:
Loaded with fat
Working out on a mat
In a gym where time simply flies.
Olaf Sturlasson’s Poetry Corner:
A young man ordered burger and fries
And to follow; two apple pies
He was told they’d be fast
But when he got them at last
All he got was a pack full of lies.
I recoil when my daughter cries,
Mama, can we have fries?
Our food is all junky,
We’re all getting chunky.
Less fries decreases our size.
And two poems on the prompt from:
Wilf Leahy:
A large old potato
Let out loud cries
When being chopped up
To make tasty fries
Wow that watered
My eyes
fries get criss cut
crossed
as we in time do oft
too much
get lost
***
Esther Chilton 
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