Well, it’s Monday again. Doesn’t the weekend fly by?! Anyway, it’s time for a new limerick challenge to kick-start your week.
Your new word is:
THUMB
Your challenge last week was to write a limerick using the word WINK in it somewhere. You came up with some really funny limericks:
Old Jim was a social klutz
Winked and tried to pat butts
Slaps didn’t phase him
Perhaps we’ll taze him!
Stay away from Jim, he’s nuts!
–
I had a moment of glee
When the beauty winked at me
But I found out why:
Something in her eye
So would I please leave her be?
The big, sad old cyclops would think:
“What I’d give to be able to blink
But with only one eye
As hard as I try,
The best I can do is just wink.”
It isn’t as hard as you think
In effect, it is just like a blink
Only done with one eye,
With the other held high,
Et voilà, you’ve perfected a wink.
Olaf Sturlasson’s Poetry Corner:
It took me a long time to think
Of a good rhyme for wink
It took more than a day
To find words to say
And think up a good rhyme for wink.
My heart just started to sink
The flowers I ordered are pink!
It’s not what I wanted
Blue – the florist said
But I wondered when he gave me a wink.
Nicola Daly:
There once was an ostrich who was tickled pink
Said, ‘I can skate better than that stinky mink
Cos my big trick
Which is rather slick
Is to wink, and not blink, on one leg around the rink!’
It all could be gone in a blink
If we don’t take time to think
About our salvation
The earth sure needs saving
Before “poof” it’s gone with a wink!
Two friends of old age
Were on their last page
Both wanting to have a last drink
“We’ve nothing to lose
So let’s both hit the booze”
And that nod was as good as a wink.
–
I am out in the cold
All battered and old
The time is upon me I think
Deep in my dreams
Where God calls me, it seems
And the devil there gives me a wink.
“It’s not hard; just give it a try,”
I said, to my rowdiest child.
But -squint as he would,
And stretch as he could,
His one-eyèd tries blinked his two eyes.
Many a faut pas driven by drink
Many a barmaid subject to my wink.
My wife disapproves,
Of my misguided moves.
To the divorce court I may finally sink.
We all raised our glasses, clink clink
Our eyes met and he gave me a wink
His foot found my thigh
I wanted to die
As my cheeks turned a deep shade of pink.
Trevor Belshaw:
I was stood in this bar at a holiday camp
at the Bricklayers annual convention,
when a gorgeous blonde lass, way out of my class
waved at me to get my attention.
She put one long finger right up to her lips,
then winked her right eye once or twice.
I started to grin, thought, ‘blimey! I’m in.’
I was up by her side in a trice.
I said. ‘Hi I’m Rab, and I think you’re just fab.
How about a slow one then, Hun?’
She said. ‘You’ve no chance. I’m not going to dance.
I just noticed your flies were undone.’
***
Esther Chilton 
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