Laughing Along With A Limerick

I’m at Swanwick Writing Summer School for the week, where I’m teaching and also being inspired by some wonderful writers. I hope your week is as good as mine. Here’s to a productive week 😄

Your new limerick challenge is as follows:

SHORT

Your challenge last week was to write a limerick using the word CHILD in it somewhere. Here are your masterpieces:

Trent’s World:

A Sunday child is our Kate

In this Monday world, she’s always late

Tuesday is a fetter

Wednesday, Thursday aren’t much better

But when Friday comes, she’ll celebrate.

Kim Smyth:

There once was a man with a curse

He’d been stuffed in her purse

He screamed, “Let me out!”

She said, “No, you clout!

Because when I do it’ll be worse!”

Christine Mallaband-Brown:

The child liked to paint flowers

She would colour them for hours

But once she used blue

Or, maybe another hue

And daubed paint on all of ours!

Lance Greenfield:

Bony Tony’s child was cursed;

Kidnapped, aged seven, by Wicked Nurse.

At last, he escaped,

With a magical jape,

Entrancing Nurse with his cleverest verse.

TanGental:

After the car and cat, we went wild,

And decided it was time to have a child.

But when a teenage zoo

Followed years of poo,

We wished the concept, first, we’d trialled.

After 60 years being meek and mild

I decided to embrace my inner child;

But after months of being gobby

My mates, all rather snobby

Have me as ‘former friend’ now filed.

Quiall:

There once was a child I’ll call Bob,

Who everyone said was a slob,

I know children are scruffy,

And occasionally stuffy,

But I think cute is their job!

Daniel Kemp:

I once knew a child of nine,

I told him he wasn’t mine.

He laughed in my face,

He said he was saved from disgrace,

As I looked more like Frankenstein.

Val Fish:

She was such a beautiful child

She’d light up the room when she smiled

When it came to the guys

With her baby blue eyes

She had each and every one beguiled.

***

31 responses to “Laughing Along With A Limerick”

  1. Last week I really came up short
    Pulled a ligament, am overwrought

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Last week I really came up short
    Pulled a ligament, am overwrought
    Walking now with crutches (two).
    I’m in a pickle, can’t wear my shoe.
    From an ambulance advice I sought!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Super! Thank you 💐

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I am actually on crutches! I really did hurt myself. They say talk about what you know!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Poor you. I hope things ease for you soon xx

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Actually getting the Dr to visit as I can’t get out

        Liked by 1 person

      4. I hope he can help 🤗

        Liked by 1 person

  3. A short visit, if I may
    Because I have something to say
    When life’s a bit tough
    And you’re feeling rough
    Switch off, and have a play

    Now I don’t mean like a kid
    (Though I wouldn’t blame you, if you did)
    I mean, relax, kick back
    Somehow find the knack
    Of recharging, off the grid

    🙂

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Excellent. Thanks, Ritu. Just been in a talk with your publishers here at Swanwick. They’re lovely!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh, they are lovely! Are you there all week? ❤

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Yes. It’s been great 😊❤

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Short is a measurement of height.
    It can also show a difference in sight.
    But impatient of mind,
    I think you will find,
    Hotheaded will cause you to fight.

    To continue a theme that is short,
    And I know I should be a good sport.
    But words are my thing,
    Cuz they won’t let me sing,
    Perhaps I will simply abort.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Really enjoyed these two. Thank you 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  5. once was
    now is
    too so often
    as not

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Lately my patience is short
    Nothing good to report
    Done with negative things
    I wish I had bird’s wings
    I’d fly to some topical resort!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. So would I! 😂

      Liked by 1 person

  7. “Keep your poems short, if you please”
    Said the critic, with a sneeze
    “Wadsworth you ain’t
    Your vision is faint
    Read too much and my mind’ll freeze!”

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Now that’s a critique! Thanks, Trent 😊

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Pretty harsh.. Oh,thinking of that, here is another:

        “He’s too short” she said as she dumped Joe
        Funny, as he is the tallest man I know
        I won’t pry
        About where he’s shy
        Perhaps his temper is quick to go

        Of course it is his short temper she isalking about. Some people always think the worst 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Thank you for another!

        Liked by 1 person

  8. There are things that a dwarf can’t be taught
    For there’s books that for them can’t be bought
    Likewise for an elf
    Stuff from the top shelf
    Out of reach for a creature so short

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Great fun. Thank you.

      Like

  9. When born, they said I’d be short
    And my life exceedingly fraught;
    But I’ve increased my length
    And with it my strength
    On a diet of kimchi and port.

    ‘Now listen,’ my mother’d exhort,
    ‘There’s one lesson that should always be taught.’
    ‘Don’t pass up the chance,
    To pee in advance,
    And avoid being caught that bit short.’

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Not ever tried kimchi but I like port!

      Like

      1. You know you’ve entered a world of woo-woo pretension when the cafe serves kimichi and mozarella toasties…

        Liked by 1 person

  10. […] summer sojourn away from the blogosphere, I find myself tempted back by the latest of Esther’s #limerick prompts: short. […]

    Like

  11. Daniel Kemp Avatar
    Daniel Kemp

    I don’t know if I’ve entered this one already. I can’t see it, but I’m sure I have. If not__

    I once knew a child named Short
    He served an ace on a tennis court.
    The ball went through the wire
    And bounced off the church spire,
    Which now has steel poles in support.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You have and I’ve scheduled it in for Monday. Thank you. Have a great weekend 😊

      Liked by 1 person

  12. 😆😆😆 These are wonderful!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a reply to artbychristinemallabandbrown Cancel reply

Discover more from Esther Chilton

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading