Here’s to a great week! Your new limerick challenge is as follows:
SCONE
Your challenge last week was to write a limerick using the word HELL in it somewhere. Here are your masterpieces:
No words can describe the foul smell
Of a hermit crab, dead in its shell.
If you find one of those
Just cover your nose
And ask just what is this fresh hell.
They rang the bell
When from grace she fell
No longer on top
Hitting the ground with a plop
Exclaiming, “What fresh hell?”
Ritu:
Jill looked into the well
Precisely where he fell
She called out “Oh, Jack!”
But there was no voice back
“Our mum’s going to give me hell!”
I’ve had a hell of a cold
It’s made me feel really quite old
Coughing and sneezing
Hacking and wheezing
A remedy, I need to be sold!
I think that Hell will be cold
So uncomfortable when you’re old
Craving warm weather
Get rid of this sweater
Baring skin isn’t just for the bold!
Can you look at my bill, please?
It is full of unexplained fees
That’s quite a lot
For who knows what
Before I pay, Hell will freeze.
–
I see you didn’t like it a bit
Me and my unhinged wit
You say it’s crude
And sometimes rude
But I shan’t go to Hell for it.
Commuting is the worst kind of hell
Which can leave you distinctly unwell
You’ll soon be believing
That stopping breathing
Is better than some second-hand smell.
Hell hath no fury, its said
As that woman scorned, I saw red
I kicked him out the door
And as for his whore
I kicked her right out of my bed!
I only tried to wish her well
She thought I said, “You go to hell.”
The look I got
Hurt a lot
‘Cause I tripped and fell in a well.
Linking People 2003:
Oh, hell, will end of burka practice end sobriety?
Yes, because burka allays beauty anxiety,
Among women; subdues voyeuristic pleasure,
For men, preventing violence without measure,
Against women around the globe, notoriety!
***
Esther Chilton 
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