Laughing Along With A Limerick

Here’s to a great new week! Your new limerick challenge is as follows:

JUMP

Your challenge last week was to write a limerick using the word FORK in it somewhere. Here are your masterpieces:

Keith Channing:

I picked up some food on my fork.
Turned out it was pickle, not pork.
I showed it to Mike
And asked: What’m I like?
He replied: In a word, you’re a dork!

Annette Rochelle Aben:

Oh my, so many do brood
Over just how to eat their food
A fork, spoon, or a knife
My goodness, such strife
Use fingers and simply be crude!

Chel Owens:

Young Harold -his mum called him ‘Will’-
Thought manners at table, unreal.
“I’ve a hand!” He impugned,
“Take this fork, take this spoon;”
“I only need one utensil!”

Ruth Scribbles:

My friends, they all called me a dork
‘cause I didn’t know what was a fork
They took my butter knife
And threatened my life
Now this dork can eat with a fork.

Trent’s World:

There was a man from New York
Who thought he was a troll or an orc
No smile or greeting
To the people he’s meeting
He’d rather stab ’em with a fork.



My path forked in the wood
And for a while there I stood
It should be straight
And now I’m late
The stupid map is no good!

Kim Smyth:

At Wendy’s they gave me a spork
A combo of spoon and a fork
The salad wouldn’t stay
It never cut meat anyway
So they went back to the fork!

Christine Mallaband-Brown:

I decided to eat with my fork
A juicy big slice of pork
From a pig roast
Cooked by our host
While we chatted and had a good talk.

Lance Greenfield:

There was a grey parrot from Cork,
Whose talk sounded more like a SQUAWK!
But his manners were good,
Especially with food.
For his seedcake he’d use a small fork.

***

27 responses to “Laughing Along With A Limerick”

  1. I like the meme.
    Has anyone else noticed that little girls skip along. Little boys run along, faster than their little legs can carry them and often fall over.
    Little boys suffer more grazed knees than little girls.
    Lesson NOT learned by the boys!

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Ha, ha. So true!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. There once was a boy named Bert
    Who tripped and fell in the dirt
    Not one to slump
    He was up with a jump
    But fell again, and it hurt!
    *
    The quick fox jumped over the dog
    Who acted as lazy as a log
    All this hype
    To practice type
    My fingers begin to bog…

    Liked by 7 people

      1. He might be the best at bouncing back, but he is bad at balance…

        Liked by 2 people

  3. Everyone’s cheering me; JUMP!
    But check out the size of my rump
    I might make it over
    A short field of white clover
    But I’ll never hurdle that stump!

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Self-deprecating, yet hilarious!

      Liked by 4 people

    2. Great fun, Annette!

      Liked by 2 people

  4. the spider did jump on my head
    I ran ‘round the yard with much dread
    I washed my hair well
    the welt it did swell
    the spider, oh yes, now is dead

    Liked by 5 people

  5. Not all things are quite as they seem.
    Such as: when I saw this week’s theme,
    It moved me to jump
    Just like Forrest Gump
    And, like him, do something extreme!

    Liked by 6 people

    1. That gave me a big smile. Thanks, Keith.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Thanks, Esther 😁🙏

        Liked by 2 people

  6. ‘Jump up and catch that fly
    Before it soars into the sky’
    So the cat leapt up
    As her friend said ‘hup’
    But missed and the fly said ‘bye’!

    Liked by 5 people

    1. My cat loves to try and catch flies but often misses!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Oh, that last hurdle I must jump
    Which means more time on my rump,
    To finish my story
    Might mean certain glory
    So the deadline now I must trump!

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Ha, ha! That made me laugh 😆

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Good! My job is done! 😉

        Liked by 2 people

  8. A flat battery ruined my friendship with Adrian Crump
    Who knocked on my door and asked me for a jump.
    When I queried ‘How high?’,
    He poked me in the eye
    And told me he thought I was a total and utter chump…
    (though I may have misheard that last bit)

    Liked by 5 people

    1. Very funny, Geoff 😆

      Like

  9. Once, I found I was touring the zoo
    ‘Plete with badgers, a monkey, a gnu.
    Near the Australia pen
    Jumped a man, name of Ben,
    Who swore he was part kangaroo.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Excellent! I really enjoyed that, Chel.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I once knew a boxer called Thumper,
    Whose brother was the world’s greatest jumper.
    His Fosbury flop
    Took him right to the top.
    They’re now both retired and much plumper.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I love that! So witty 😊

      Liked by 1 person

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