It’s Monday and limerick time. I’m giving you three prompts this week. Unfortunately, I’ve got to have some more shoulder surgery, so I’ll be out of action for a while. But I’d love to see your limericks so please send them in to give me a smile. I’ll publish them all when I’m back blogging again.
PAIN
HEAL
NURSE
Here are a few limericks to make you smile this Monday. The prompt last week was TRAIN.
Train for the race, I was told;
Running, you’ll never grow old.
And so I agreed;
I did my best speed.
Now I’m just knackered and cold!
Ritu:
Now, that really is a pain
Can’t believe I did it again
Just a tad too much booze
So I had a snooze
And I’ve gone and missed my train!
Cathy Wattam:
As an actor, I do like to train
Caped crusaders are often my game
I auditioned as Robin
But ended up sobbin’
Because I was cast as Bruce Wayne.
–
There once was a man in the rain
Who had waited so long for a train
That his clothes were all soaked
And a passenger joked
That he looked like he lived down a drain.
–
It is a real bugbear of mine
That I can’t find a train that’s on time
So I stand here and wait
Know full well I’ll be late
It’s always those leaves on the line.
–
There’s one thing I’d like to explain,
I get kind of frisky on trains
I’m a great womanizer
Yes, I am the train driver
But I’ve yet to find someone complain!
–
When you are riding a train
It’s best not to take your Cocaine
The train might be busy
And you’re feeling dizzy
The question is – are you insane?
More people should ride the train
It would keep them out of the rain
The roads less clogged
Their minds less fogged
Once working they’d use more of their brain!
An 0-6-0 train in steam
Makes my hubby smile and beam
The Flying Scotsman?
He is a real Fan!
Driving it, that is his dream!
Beth married the conductor of a train
So her wedding dress had a forty-foot train
It wasn’t much fun
The thing weighed a ton
To wear it she had to exercise and train.
–
Bob trained real hard in vault
But the virus put the games to a halt
Go home and pout
For Tokyo is out
Not getting the gold isn’t your fault.
Paul Mastaglio:
Let the train
Take the strain
No more car
For those trips afar
Enjoy your day and return home again.
The amazing red head, Mary Jane,
Knew not that Spiderman stopped the train,
Her trust was slighted;
Their love was blighted,
Swallowing pride is not what she’d deign!
My owner thinks I’m just really dumb.
But truly, I’m having great fun.
On “Stay!” I run,
And I leave on “Come!”
Training treats are filling my tum!
–
We boarded a train going to Delhi.
The driver was giving it welly.
We’d not been going long
Before we were singing this song:
We’re going too fast! Our legs are shaking like jelly!
–
We all went out for a dinner in Staines.
I chose chicken Madras for my main.
The weather was foggy.
And my rice was all soggy,
So I sent the dish back to re-strain.
Linking People2013:
Education is to train the mind to think,
Station master minds the train without a blink!
School master trains the mind,
Former minds, the latter trains and is kind!
Freight train or camel train, train the camera to click!
I wish I were riding a train
Instead I got caught in the rain
I ran really fast
Went down in a splat
The concussion they say hurt my brain.
Sarian Lady:
I once had to rack my brain,
Whilst travelling home on the train.
I thought and I thought,
‘Till my nerves became fraught.
No ideas, it was all in vain.
Val Fish:
I got caught with a fine on the train
Whilst drunk, pulled the emergency chain
There’s no excuse
For improper use
Note to self; next time engage brain!
***
Esther Chilton 
No pain, no gain, they say,
Be disciplined and obey,
God will heal,
Just go through the ordeal,
Nurse will also pray!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you!
LikeLike
If you are missing Esther’s weekly Laughing Along With A Limerick challenge, have no fear! I am caretaking the spot over on my blog while she recuperates from her surgery. Esther is still providing the prompts.
So pop across to Write to Inspire and have a go.
LikeLike
With your shoulder, you must be in pain
Needing invasive surgery again,
I do hope you heal fast
So your pain doesn’t last
And you don’t get a nurse who’s insane!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Ha ha! I love that! Thank you.
LikeLike
Glad you liked it. Wishing you a very speedy recovery. Hops all goes well on Wednesday x
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you 😃
LikeLike
If you are missing Esther’s weekly Laughing Along With A Limerick challenge, have no fear! I am caretaking the spot over on my blog while she recuperates from her surgery. Esther is still providing the prompts.
So pop across to Write to Inspire and have a go.
LikeLike
I’m sorry to hear you’ve to have more surgery. You have my best wishes for a speedy recovery.
Meanwhile:
The dogs needed walking again
So I had to go out in the rain.
It would be okay
On a sunnier day
But this is a regular pain!
My shoemaker told me that he’ll
Give comfort from toe right to heel.
But each homophone
Grates right to the bone;
Those old blisters may never heal.
Nurses and doctors won’t stay
Unless they receive decent pay.
Rewards may accrue,
Some thank-you is due –
Even a fine cabernet
LikeLiked by 1 person
Super! All three made me smile. If you’d like to work on some more, over the next couple of weeks, while I’m out of action, I’d love to read them 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Help! I’m in need of a nurse,
This pain is getting much worse,
If it doesn’t heal,
I might just repeal,
Instead, call straight for the hearse!
(just kidding – hope you are back with us soonest – Laurax)
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! Hopefully I won’t need one of those 🤣 The surgery is Wednesday. It’ll be good to get it done.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Indeed. Recover speedily, Esther!
LikeLiked by 1 person
If you are missing Esther’s weekly Laughing Along With A Limerick challenge, have no fear! I am caretaking the spot over on my blog while she recuperates from her surgery. Esther is still providing the prompts.
So pop across to Write to Inspire and have a go.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That’s great – will check you out on Monday, Lance. 🤣
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have shoulder problems and sympathise. Hope the surgery goes well and sorts it out.. X
I really feel your pain
I know it must be a strain
To live with a shoulder
That makes you feel older
So your health is restored again.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks ever so much. Love the limerick. The op is Wednesday, so if you want to work on anymore over the next couple of weeks, please do. I’d love to read them.
LikeLike
I will try and remember to do more in the next couple of weeks x
LikeLiked by 1 person
After surgery it takes time to heal
It can be a very big deal
Muscles are knitting
And a sling it needs fitting
For a few weeks at least – not ideal!
LikeLiked by 1 person
If you are missing Esther’s weekly Laughing Along With A Limerick challenge, have no fear! I am caretaking the spot over on my blog while she recuperates from her surgery. Esther is still providing the prompts.
So pop across to Write to Inspire and have a go.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hope she’s well on the way to recovery x
LikeLike
You need a very good nurse
So you recover, not get worse.
So rest up your shoulder
And then you’ll get bolder
And resume your writing of verse.
X
LikeLiked by 1 person
I have enjoyed this trio 😁
LikeLike
Good x
LikeLiked by 1 person
If you are missing Esther’s weekly Laughing Along With A Limerick challenge, have no fear! I am caretaking the spot over on my blog while she recuperates from her surgery. Esther is still providing the prompts.
So pop across to Write to Inspire and have a go.
LikeLike
Pingback: Oh No! – (Monday Limerick #56) – Laura McHarrie @ The Hidden Edge
Esther has a date with doctor and nurse
Hopefully to heal the shoulder pain curse
I have naught to say
Being an ocean away
I have to send my well wishes in verse
**
A limerick with depth is a pain
Trying to cram it all in is insane
But I’ll try my best
While you heal and rest
And maybe your smile I’ll gain
**
I hope the surgery goes well! Take care of yourself 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thank you. The surgery is Wednesday. Loved the limericks 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hope all goes well 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you 😃
LikeLiked by 1 person
There once was a lady in pain
Which was made worse by the rain
The doctor did say
She needed rest for a day
So the surgery wasn’t in vain!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Super! Thanks, Kim.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re welcome and best wishes for a speedy recovery 🤗
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you 😍
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thought you’d done away with pain
But I guess it’s back again
Try opening another folder
Might have a new shoulder
Then you’ll be right as rain!
The shoulder will heal
I’m certain, I feel
You’re on the right track
In no time, you’ll be back
If not, you can always appeal!
You couldn’t do any worse
Than employ a nurse
Someone to care
Who could be right there
And that’s the end of my verse!
Cheers Paul – Hope this is the last lap for you, Esther and that you’ll be fighting fit again. 😁
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much for these, Paul, and for your kind wishes. The surgery is tomorrow so I’m looking forward to getting it over with.
LikeLike
Pingback: Monday Limericks | lyncrain
Hi Esther, sending you healing energy.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much 😊
LikeLike
For Esther
Her surgeon’s name was Socrates,
Who studied under Hypocrates.
Her nurse was Jane,
Who soothed her pain.
With friends like these, she’ll heal with ease . ..
. . . and, if my dream comes true, we’ll all be pleased!
For my Dad
Happy Birthday Bony Tony,
Always straight and never phoney.
Two years departed,
Still never outsmarted.
Let’s party with pizza calzone.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you! I love my limerick!! As far as I’m aware, my surgeon’s name is Harry, but we’ll see 🤣 The one for your dad is super. I enjoyed reading it again 😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
OK. How about this….
Her surgeon’s name was Harry.
In theatre he did not tarry.
In full command,
His healing hands,
Soon had Esther as happy as Larry.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh, that’s brilliant! And I hope I am soon happy as Larry!
LikeLiked by 1 person
PAIN HEAL NURSE
I once had a PAIN in my heel
The NURSE said there’s nothing to feel
I limped and I groaned
I groused and I moaned
The pain in my heel better HEAL???
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great! Thanks, Ruth.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hope your surgery goes well and your pain diminishes quickly!
LikeLike
“Ooh, Matron,” the patient said again
“Say that once more, and I’ll inflict pain!”
“But, Nurse, you’re meant to heal”
“Not when you cop a feel.
Patients like you, quite the bane!”
Good luck with your surgery, Esther 🥰
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks, Ritu!
LikeLike
Hahaha! Very funny! 🤣
LikeLike
Pingback: Acrostic Limericks 44 – Keith Kreates!
No self-respecting young nurse
Uses a camel-skin purse.
Regarding the rest,
Sow’s ear is best
Even if slightly perverse
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hope your shoulder op goes well Esther 🙂
LikeLike
Pingback: Random Limericks 37 – Keith Kreates!
Pingback: Acrostic Limericks 45 – Keith Kreates!
Hope you are getting better Esther . Here are my limericks
To look at my face is a pain.
The mirror should go down the drain.
A wrinkle, a blemish,
And I’m off to the chemist.
I wish I wasn’t so vain.
Can anyone, I appeal?
My broken heart to heal.
On dating apps,
I’ll find perhaps
Someone to make my head reel.
How I love a kind nurse.
I’ll explain it all in this verse.
Bed baths and pills,
To cure all my ills.
Rather than go off in a hearse.
LikeLike
I hope the nurse treats you well
And any pain they can quell
You recover full strength
At no long length
your hospital stay a short spell!
LikeLike
Pushing and panting for all I was worth
The pain was like nothing on earth
But I’d do it over again
Despite all that pain
That’s the miracle of childbirth.
LikeLike
I’ve a pain that won’t go away
It’s with me every hour of the day
But I made my bed
When I stupidly said
I would love honour and obey
LikeLike